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//My Pain became my Purpose

My Pain became my Purpose

As someone diagnosed with PTSD in my 20’s, I have seen and felt trauma after trauma and relived it over and over again. I went through psychoses, episodes of panic attacks and battling Ptsd. At the moment a lot of people go through that. But it is a subject that we rather do not talk about because it is weak. Society gives you a label and say that you do not fit in it anymore. That you need to take drugs to feel good. Unbelievable the medication they wanted to give me. Every time they tried, I felt No in my whole Being and I refused them.

How difficult and intens my proces was, I needed to do it via the natural way. In the here and now with me, myself and I and the most important one, my physical body. This whole periode where I am still going through is and has been my Life School. I learn from my own experiences and the more I dedicate myself to this path of healing the more I walk my talk. Every day saying Yes to myself and talking with my body, saying she is safe and that it is okay to be here. Remembering myself who I am.

There is still so much judgement about this subject. People say you are crazy. Also people who go through this do not dare to share about it. They are afraid of what other people might think. Especially a lot of shame. Because according to our Society you need to be a Strong human being. Strong, not vulnerable, but as in hard, forcing yourself. Shutting down all your feelings and GO GO GO!!!

It touches me deeply to hear over and over again that a beautiful Soul committed suïcide. People have intens stories you don’t know about. Suicide is one of the most difficult topics to make sense of. There is so much tragedy and sadness in the world already, it can be hard to wrap one’s head around why someone would want to take their own life. We often hear people talk about suicide as a selfish act saying, “how could they do that to their family or children?”

I think it’s extremely important not to blame or judge. If you don’t know the pain and heartache someone is experiencing, you have no right to judge what is going on. The first thing that comes to my mind when I hear of another suicide is the level of pain the person must have been in. It is unimaginable pain and hard for some of us to even understand. It makes me always feel so sad to think of someone being in that much pain.

I myself also had these thoughts lots of times. If you experience so much trauma it is not strange to feel this as a human being. That you want to go Home. For years I woke up with these thoughts and fell asleep with them. I was driving in my car and thinking which tree to bump into. So all the pain would end immediately.

But thank GOD I still felt a strong connection with the Source, Universe, however you want to call it. And I was also lucky that I had the right people around me at the time and still do. Because I believe that when we have the right people around us, people can go through these episodes without regular medicine/ drugs. Because a new Path is being showed to you. One of Not Knowing, free of all earthly attachments. And yes that is fucking scary. But the only thing we need is being held. Feel that we are safe, okay and not crazy.

I want to invite all of You, if you know somebody who is going through these episodes of major transformation. Please ask them how they are doing and what they need. The only thing we need is LOVE. Because we are all going through this. Our Mother Earth is going through a major Psychosis, Transformation and so are we.

Because for me a psychosis, PTSD, depression or burn-out are all magical opportunities to Wake up and Birth your most powerful Self!!

Start Rewriting your Life Story & Rediscover Who you are ❤️

It’s all about Devotion!

By | 2020-05-17T16:18:23+00:00 oktober 15th, 2017|Uncategorized|0 Comments

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